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101: Saying thanks

>Thank you is more than just good manners (Spring.org.uk)
Creative ways to say thanks (Mashable)
Overcaffeinators may have more trouble expressing their feelings (PopSci)


Full episode text

It may seem like two very tiny little words, but saying “thank you” has a big impact. Study after study after study shows that expressing gratitude benefits not only your existing social relationships, but builds new relationships, and even benefits your own mental state. The simple act of saying “thank you” to someone can in fact double their willingness to help someone else in a similar situation later.

There are situations where we’re almost programmed to self-deprecate instead of saying “thank you”. When we’re told we look great in that dress, when we receive constructive feedback, or when someone compliments us about something we did.

Sometimes, though, it’s easier to express thanks in some way other than those two words. Directly expressing can be difficult for some — in fact, some studies say that if you’re the type of person that guzzles caffeine, you may also be the type of person that has significant difficulty expressing emotions directly.

You don’t always have to use those exact words, though. You can, instead, say “thank you” in a variety of ways. One of the most powerful things, in any relationship, is showing someone that they have been heard and listened to. So showing someone that you’re hearing them is a great way to saying thank you. If you’re a candy fan, then specially-wrap some favorite candy for someone.

If you love music, make them a playlist. If you’re the type of person always on SnapChat, I’ve even heard of thank you stories working great.

Honestly, the details aren’t the important thing. Listening to, paying attention, and saying thank you in a way that shows that their kindness is important enough that you are paying attention.